Remember how I talked to you about confidence? I’d say I’m fairly confident. I hold my head up high, eyes up towards the sky.
No wait, that’s not because of confidence, it’s because I like to dream.
Dream about the world around me, making sense of things I see and hear and feel. Dreaming helps me understand.
It’s tricky though… It’s hard not to get lost in dreams and lose my grip on reality because the dreams are so much better than what’s real. But are they really that much better?
Let’s review: in one dream I can do endless pirouettes. In another I get a lead role. I wake up feeling whole for just a second before it all slips away and I realise it was just a dream.
In one dream I’m late to the performance and the show goes on without me. In another I forget all the steps. I wake up in a panic before it all slips away and I realise it was just a dream.
In one dream I’m on vacation with friends I barely get to see. In another they’ve forgotten all about me. I wake up dazed and confused before it all slips away and I realise it was just a dream.
See? It’s tricky. There are good dreams and bad ones, recurring dreams, others I see only once. There seems to be a balance though, for every good one, a not-so-good one to pull me back down to earth. Eyes forward, not up.
Funny how this came to be. I let my thoughts carry me here in stead of forcibly trying to make sense of them. Is it a lesson in how I am to approach my dreams? I suppose I can just let them happen and enjoy the fading memories or forget them quickly. I shouldn’t dwell on them, or spend too much time deciphering them. I should live more out here, in this crazy world.
But in this world, I can’t do endless pirouettes.